"What Every Parent Should Know Before Sending Their Child to College: Financial, Emotional, and Academic Realities"
A few days ago, I helped my daughter move into her dorm room at a private college across the country. It was a beautiful campus—tree-lined paths, historic buildings, and excited students buzzing with energy. But as I walked back to the car alone, the joy of watching her begin a new chapter was mixed with worry and reflection. I realized there are some things I wish I had known—or at least truly understood—before she packed her bags and stepped into this new world. If you’re a parent preparing to send your child to college, here’s what I think you need to know: financially, emotionally, and academically.
Financially, nothing can prepare you for how quickly the costs add up. We had saved for years, carefully reviewed tuition and housing costs, and thought we had a good plan. But even with scholarships, there were expenses we didn’t expect—books that cost hundreds, lab fees, transportation home for the holidays, and things like health insurance and laundry supplies. And then there’s the emotional strain that money decisions bring. It’s not just about paying the bills—it’s about learning how to talk to your child about money, budgeting, and the value of their education. I wish I had taught my daughter more about managing a checking account, understanding credit, and making smart spending decisions before she left.
Emotionally, letting go is harder than I ever imagined. No matter how ready they seem, most 18-year-olds still call home in tears at some point. My daughter is strong and independent, but that didn’t stop her from feeling overwhelmed those first few days. And as her dad, not being there to help hurt more than I expected. But I’ve learned that part of parenting is stepping back and trusting that we’ve given them the tools to stand on their own. They need to learn to ask for help, manage their own time, and handle stress. As hard as it is, that’s where growth happens.
Academically, college is a huge leap—even for high achievers. The pace is faster, the expectations are higher, and the competition is tougher. Students need more than intelligence; they need discipline, time management, and a willingness to seek support. We spent so much time preparing her for the application process, but not enough time talking about how to stay organized, when to visit professors during office hours, or how to handle academic failure. These conversations matter.
If I could speak to every parent sending their child off to college, I’d say this: educate yourself as much as you’re educating them. Talk about money, mental health, and realistic expectations. Prepare them to live on their own—but prepare yourself to let go. And finally, remind them—and yourself—that college isn’t just about getting a degree. It’s about growing up. It’s about becoming who they’re meant to be.
Watching my daughter take that first step away from home was bittersweet. But I know she’s ready. And so am I—at least, I’m getting there.